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Webster women

Esb If the comments on this sort of creepy Curbed item are any indication, New York real estate savants are unfortunately ignorant about one of the more fascinating buildings in the city, the Webster Apartments, on the westernmost reaches of 34th Street.

Commenters who protest, "How can this be legal? All women housing," and, better still, "creepy. where's this building? why is it 'all women?'" do themselves a disservice by not visiting the Webster's fine Web site, where one can see charming pictures, I'd guess circa 1987, of the "fashion merchandisers, designers, artists, lawyers, teachers, actresses, technicians and many other business and professional women" who reside in this odd throwback.

Your City Mouse is (formerly) one of those "other business and professional women." I don't recall meeting any technicians or lawyers during my four-month stay there a few years ago, shortly after the end of the first fussy sublet that brought me to the city. I do remember lots of pretty, young, enthusiastic intern types. This, after all, was what the building was designed for – housing bright-eyed young things as they got their starts in the big city. The founders of the residence, the brothers Charles and Josiah Webster, established it in 1916 “solely for the purpose of providing unmarried working women with homes and wholesome food at a small cost to them.” It also provided cheap housing for the burgeoning workforce at the megastore just up the street, in which the brothers had inherited a majority ownership from their cousin, Roland H. Macy.

The residence, ostensibly open to unmarried ladies “regardless of their religious belief or nationality,” continues to fulfill its mission, more or less, to this day. After a brief application process, including furnishing proof of employment, Webster women are assigned a weekly rental rate based on their income. I think mine, calibrated to the highest level, was around $220 a week, two relatively wholesome meals per day included – plus, of course, the blissful privacy of a roughly 100-square-foot room of one’s own.

I've been trying to write about the Webster for the longest time, but it was a strange period in my life and I always end up abandoning the project, getting lost in the maudlin journals I kept that winter. Somehow all those complicated, sad, lonely, yet desperately hopeful feelings I was grappling with upon my arrival to the big city got tangled up with my feelings for the building itself. It was a place where you could catch a glimpse from a certain angle – the utilitarian, aqua-painted 1930s fan secured to the wall above the bed; the fire safety cards by the elevators instructing ladies to "gather your purse and your gloves" before exiting the building in case of an emergency; the creaky metal contraptions, apparently designed for indoor clothes drying before the age of dryers, lining the walls of the laundry rooms; the heavy metal skeleton key that accessed the tiny room’s door as well as the “trunk room” for extra storage – and be transported easily into the past.

Sitting at my white-painted metal desk writing letters to North Carolina (approximation of the scene here, without quite so much hair volume), washing my face in the small porcelain sink with its old ceramic fixtures, staring uptown at the glow from Times Square to the northeast outside my eighth-floor window, I’d imagine the girls in my room before me. Who lived in Room 817 in 1981? 1942? Who was the first girl, in 1926? I conjured a Midwestern farm girl, having come to the city to (she told Ma and Pa) pursue work as a sales clerk, bounding in the door after successfully auditioning to join the Ziegfeld chorus. I saw another starry-eyed girl from the south, perhaps not so fortunate, rubbing her sore feet after another long day working the Macy’s perfume counter in heels. I worried about a lost soul from upstate getting caught up with a bad downtown crowd in the 70s, maybe never making it back to 817 one night. All these ghosts – decades of them – of hope, of loneliness, of the fear surrounding their “unmarried” status, tossing in that same old creaky metal twin bed, applying lipstick in the same heavy etched mirror, sighing over the same maddeningly slow elevators, late to work again.

So you see why I run aground trying to write about the damn place – I just can’t do it without slipping into the voice of Thomas Wolfe. O lost!

But onward. On the other end of the age spectrum, the Webster in my day was inhabited by a coven of postmenopausal lifers. These women had somehow been grandmothered out of the clause specifying a maximum length of stay of up to a year – in fact, I was told some of these dames had lived there for decades. Sometimes you could get a glimpse into one of their rooms along the narrow corridors, piled to the rafters with all of their belongings as well as a contraband cooler. The plastic Igloo was the true sign of a lifer, as far as I could tell – no cooking was allowed on the premises; one took her meals during specified hours in the ground-floor cafeteria, but some of these thrifty ladies had apparently devised a way to preserve leftovers or food from the diners in the area.

Anyway, I’d be remiss if I didn’t tell you I was anxious about my position on the Webster age spectrum, going through the fourth or fifth of my probably countless midlife crises. I found myself in an uncomfortable space somewhere between the loud, sociable, full-of-promise interns (whose constant complaints about the place – its “gross” old fixtures and “creepy” staffers and general uncoolness – always piqued my latent hostility toward them), and the quietly dignified aging set, whom I admired for their practical spirits but whose very presence, of course, served as a reminder of what might happen if I didn’t get my act together very, very soon.

And I’d be lying if I didn’t admit that I associated a certain odor that hung around the halls of the Webster -- a mix of decades-old stale smoke and something like wet dog, mixed with whatever industrial cleanser was used to swab the communal bathroom and shower facilities – with the older ladies. I desperately hoped the smell didn't cling to me and tail me outside the building.

Just as the Curbed comments suggested, the gender segregation of the Webster was the first point of interest for everyone I told about my residence. Some variation of “do you/do others ever sneak boys in,” always came up immediately in conversations about it. And I’d laugh along and explain the rules – no boys allowed, except by prior arrangement and then only at designated times in the publicly accessible sitting areas or piano rooms off the lobby – and these explanations were met by further comments about Bosom Buddies, and Sapphic affairs, and passing guys off as your dad/brother/shrink, and on and on, none of which I ever found as amusing as my interlocutors seemed to.

Having left a long-term relationship down south, I was reaching the far end of the age at which a woman could respectably be defined as young and unmarried (certainly by Charles and Josiah’s standards). I had a new job I wasn’t sure I liked, and new acquaintances I wasn’t sure liked me, and I really hadn’t been single for any length of time since age 17, and I was worried about the clinging odor of the Webster, and I seemed to have lost all knowledge of how dating worked, or even flirting, for that matter, and I hadn't been able to shake an unattractive habit of talking about my ailing, elderly cat back in North Carolina every five minutes or so. So for me, the segregation was probably for the best – as thrilling as it was to be kissed by a rakish flirt on 34th Street, the Empire State building glowing white up above, it was equally thrilling to tell him, sorry, no boys allowed!, and spare myself certain heartbreak by ending our date chastely on the curb.

And so I spent a good deal of my time on my own. I tried to pour my romantic energies into the city, telling myself I was falling in love with the far west side of Manhattan. Despite the brutal temperatures of January-through-early spring, I would take any excuse to visit the Webster’s expansive rooftop "garden" (such as it was, in winter) and look across at its iconic neighbor down the street, or wander the sketchy blocks below Port Authority until forced back by weather or common sense to the residence, where I’d be met by the gruff Russian doorman who never remembered I lived there, night after night. 

Maybe it was this anonymity that mattered most to me about the Webster, a sense of safety that kept me sequestered there for four months when I could have found myself a proper rental earlier. In any case, by the time spring started to thaw things out, I’d found my current apartment across town.

As much as I protested I’d miss southern Hell’s Kitchen, miss the weird little Dyer Avenue area, the desolation of 10th Avenue on a Sunday afternoon, walking over the railyards, I haven’t made it out there too often since my move. In a way, I kind of like thinking of the Webster, and the time I lived there, as imaginary. Only in an imaginary world, real estate observers might say, will New York's mercenary developers manage to miss this piece of prime property over the next few years. Meanwhile, I can imagine the future unmarried working women of Room 817, imagining some version of me, in the receding past.

October 19, 2006 in Moping | Permalink | Comments (18) | TrackBack (0)

Happy birthday, Stanky

Camellia My mother, bless her heart, calls me up each year on my birthday to remind me that "X years ago was the MOST IMPORTANT DAY OF [HER] LIFE!" Such are the advantages of being an only child. I suppose it was the most important day of mine, too. But it's a lot of pressure to put on one poor day.

Twenty years ago today was not THE most important day of my life, but I guess it ranks up there. In June of 1986, my dear departed kittycat, Sheba, was smuggled to me, against my mom's wishes, under my friend Tippy's red Members Only jacket. Born in a barn somewhere outside Mauldin, SC, Sheba (then for some reason named "Mr. T," by Tippy and her sister Ginny) was a tiny blue-grey thing, small enough to fit in my palm, and riddled with all sorts of mites, worms, fleas, and infections. We figured she was about six weeks old, so I gave her my May 9 birthday.

There was never any doubt that Sheba was my baby, not a family cat -- a responsibility made clear when, two years later, my mom gave up on trying to deal with the early-teenaged me and told me not to come back from visiting my father in Seattle for the summer. The next day, Sheba was shipped air cargo from Greenville-Spartanburg to a warehouse at Sea-Tac, where my stepmom and I picked her up, blinking groggily. She purred as soon as she realized it was me.

Being a young cat mother carried with it a lot of responsibility, especially post-highschool -- I never did the semester abroad in college I'd dreamed of, couldn't live in a dorm (had I wanted to, that is), and mostly brought boys back to my apartment rather than staying away from her all night. Looking for apartments always entailed finding a place of which Sheba (aka Stanky, aka Sheba Amoeba, aka Shebalu, etc. ad infinitum)would approve. I chose to return to the south for grad school partly because I knew she'd be comfortable there. But, as moms say, it was all worth it to have the fluffiest, snuggliest, goofiest, most beautiful cat you've ever seen for a companion (if you never met her, you'll just have to take my word for it -- references available upon request).

Sheba lived many places over her 17-year life, but I'm pretty sure that she loved the last place she lived best, a run-down Arts-and-Crafts original in Chapel Hill, with a screened-in porch and lots of yard to ponder. Outside the big window in the front of the house was a gorgeous, prolific pink camellia bush; she'd sit in a sunny spot on a chair we set up for her in front of the window and wait for me or her daddy to come home. After parking in the yard, we'd stand there like dorks in front of the house, waving through the window at her huge, round green eyes. Toward the end of her life, she mostly stayed in that spot, and after she succumbed to all sorts of older cat diseases two years ago, we decided to place her remains under the bush.

So if you happen to be driving down Pritchard Street in Chapel Hill this week, be sure to slow down and appreciate the camellias, which are always so pretty this time of year.

And on a lighter note, new cat dad Mr. Management sends an article on Belgium's annual dead cat festival, which takes place each May in Ypres. More info here and here. Another reason Belgium is crawling up my list of places to visit soon!

May 09, 2006 in Moping | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Speaking of libraries ...

Zines ... everyone's favorite magazine of limited usefulness, Time Out, this week profiled a Barnard College librarian, Jenna Freedman, responsible for amassing a sizeable zine collection -- 1,500 of them on the shelves, all of which are "written by females (or individuals who identify as such), with subjects ranging from political activism to punk rock." (I guess this means no Tourist Trap archives, alas).

The library has a slick Web site, including an extensive discussion on the blogs-vs.-zines question. (The title "Zines are Not Blogs" sorta gives away its stance). Says Freedman:

Definitions of the word “zine” vary tremendously, but they do tend to have these common characteristics:

  1. Self-published and the publisher doesn’t answer to anyone
  2. Small, self-distributed print run
  3. Motivated by desire to express oneself rather than to make money
  4. Outside the mainstream
  5. Low budget
    

There is something deliciously tangible about a zine. If only one could transfer that fresh-from-Kinko's smell to the Internet. Also, it's much harder to draw online, illustration being one thing I always treasured about my friend Diana's zine in the 1990s (about which I actually wrote an ambitious Hebdige-ean analysis for a college seminar on "The Gothic Aesthetic" -- ah, those were the days). But I never can get too far into these ontological discussions about what "blogs" are, as opposed to "the MSM," as opposed to "zines," as opposed to "those great, long, lovingly crafted letters my friends and I used to swap until I got lazy and dropped the ball" (Country Mouse, I still owe you one).

Anyway, mostly I was just happy to see that these things are being archived.

April 06, 2006 in Moping | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBack (0)

Checking out

Pazzia_1 My New York public library visits tend to come in two flavors: thrilling and successful, or depressing and creepy. During the former, I show up armed with a list, pluck everything on the list easily from the shelves, and stumble across a few gems I'd forgotten I wanted to read, or never even heard of. The high I get from these visits is not unlike the one that accompanies a great shopping trip at a discount retailer (my sister, observing me in one such frenzy at the Seattle Nordstrom Rack, said my "shopping face" can be a bit unnerving -- OK, "scary" was her word).

I remember this acquisition-high from going to the library as a child -- I never got over the thrill of realizing that all this stuff you want is yours for the taking. Sure, you have to give it back eventually, but at the rate I plowed through books as a lonely kid, the book's purpose was served and spent after the last page was turned, and I was eager to send it back for a fresh batch. Anyway, the NYPL, while fraught with disappointments such as the cruel Sunday/Monday closings and some really down-at-heel facilities, often can be relied on to produce a pretty satisfying haul.

Then there are those sadder visits, such as the one I had today, on a quick lunchtime jaunt to the little downtown branch nearest my office. The "New Amsterdam" name has a certain charm to it, and while the branch is in sore need of an upgrade, I've smelled worse in the Manhattan system. On my way up Murray Street, clutching my list optimistically in my pocket, I passed a short man who gave me a cheery "hello." I replied with the cordial-yet-noncommittal nod and slight quickening of pace required in these situations.

Once inside, my mood was dampened by the orangeish fluorescent lights and the utter mess of some of the tables, but I soldiered on. First book on the list -- no dice. Second -- nope. Third -- this is not your day. Fourth -- give it up, will you? Having struck out entirely, I set out for the Old Reliables, those authors with a vast body of work I haven't yet plumbed the depths of, but who can usually be counted on to produce something satisfying. The Graham Greene section was bare. Approaching the TC Boyle section required maneuvering around a tall seated man who seemed occupied with nothing but producing a full-body backward stretch from his chair that would bring him into physical contact with passing female patrons. And once I passed this challenge, no Boyle to be found.

Scanning the new nonfiction section for a fresh discovery, my mood turned ever more glum -- will there be a day when I'll need to come to the library in search of that "Coping with Breast Cancer" book? How about "So You Want a Baby and He Doesn't"? And in the fiction new releases -- how is it that I'm fooled, every time, into thinking that a mammoth novel by one STEVE MARTINI is a surprise new release by actor, writer, and art collector Steve Martin? I begin to question my own critical faculties. If you're dim enough to make that kind of mistake, I think, you'll never publish a book -- and what's the point of it all anyway, it'll just end up among these lonely stacks, covered in smudged, yellowing cellophane ... look at the rows, hundreds upon hundreds of phone calls to Mom announcing that the novel's finally been published, all the proud updates to college alumni newsletters ... who are all these people?

I made my way to the alphabetized fiction aisle one last time, scanning quickly, hoping inspiration would strike. Ha Jin! I thought -- he's just what I need now, a writer I love whose work I haven't kept up with. But then the old question -- H or J? Again muttering to myself about my intellectual shortcomings (for this is a question I've been nerdy enough to look up in the past, but forgot the answer to), I struck out in the H section and approached the Js. Just then, a figure materialized to my left -- the same short man who'd greeted me on Murray Street! Standing inappropriately closely, he greeted me with another, more familiar, "hi!" I looked at the shelf directly in front of me, grabbed the first book within reach, and fled with no cordial nod.

Approaching the checkout desk, I glanced down at the hefty (or at least big for Jin -- or is it Ha?) novel in my hand: The Crazed. I'm looking forward to reading it.

UPDATE: Great, now I can add guilt to my library visits! I knew I was missing something. Via Maud

April 05, 2006 in Moping | Permalink | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)

eek

a blog!!!

March 27, 2006 in Moping | Permalink | Comments (0)

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